Archives for “Animal Jokes”
A policeman stopped a motorist and was surprised to see a dozen of penguins on the back seat. “You shouldn’t be driving around with penguins like that,” he told the man. “Take them to the zoo.” The man promised he to do so and the policeman allowed him to drive off. The next day, however, [...]
A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, “but I haven’t got the energy. “Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.” The turkey pecked at a lump of dung [...]
Why are giraffes brave? Because they stick their necks out
Why was the chicken sent home from school? Because it used fowl language.
Two men went hunting and shot at a deer at the same time. Since they used the same type of guns and there was only one bullet entry wound on the deer they started arguing over who actually shot the deer. They sought help from the park ranger who happened to pass by. “The preacher [...]
Teacher: Chloe , your composition on ‘My Cat’ is exactly the same as your sister’s. Did you copy from her ? Chloe : No, teacher We have the same the same cat.
An old lady lost her cat and called the police hotline 999. Police Operator: This is the police, what can I do for you? Old Lady: My Willie is missing Police Operator: How old is Willie and how is he related to you? Old Lady: Willie is my cat Police Operator: Mdm, this is the [...]
An old lady went to see her tailor to make a tie for Willie, her cat. Since she could not give the exact measurement for the length of her cat, the tailor asked, Why dont you bring your cat here for me to do some measurements? The old lady replied, I couldnt do that. The [...]
A man walks into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shopkeeper points to two identical looking parrots in a cage and says: “This first parrot costs $100 and the other one costs $5000″. Customer: “Why does the second parrot cost so much more? What can it do?” Shopkeeper: ” To be honest that [...]
Question: Why do cows wear bells? Answer: Because they lost their horns.
Boy: What kind of dog is that? Mrs Tan: Oh, my dog is a police dog. Boy: You must be joking. It sure doesn’t look like one to me. Mrs Tan: Of course not. He’s in the Secret Service (doing undercover work).