Archives for “Marriage”
“Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.”
You get mixed feelings when your mother in law drives over the clift in your new car.
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
Dear Tech Support Team: Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child-processes thattook up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and nowmonitors all other system activities. Applications such as BachelorNights 10.3, Cricket [...]
Wife: Dont you think our son inherit all my intelligence? Husband: Seems like it since I still have mine
This 8 year old girl is very pretty and many of the boys in her class are very fond of her. One day she came home and told her mother very excitedly that her classmate Peter has proposed to her. She further asked her mother innocently if she should marry Peter. Her mother replied,’ Does [...]
Wife: I think you married me because my grandfather left me a lot of money. Husband: That is not true. I don’tt really care who left you the money.
Marriage is a partnership. My wife is the active partner. I am the silent partner.
Son: Daddy, what is a weapon? Dad: Son, a weapon is something you use to fight with. Son: Is mum your weapon?
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.
Phases of marriage life. 1st Year: The man speaks and the woman listens. 2nd Year: The woman speaks and the man listens. 3rd Year: They both speak and the neighbors listen. 4th Year: Both woman and man speak and their children listen 15th Year: Parents speak but teenage don’t listen 40th Year: Both man and woman are too [...]
Marriage Tip If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.